Let’s Talk
About Birth!
Pictured: At Naolí Vinaver’s rebozo workshop, 50 women came together for a transformational experience to learn traditional Mexican midwifery techniques and philosophies, and form a close bond with other amazing birth workers! I’m 4th from the left in the back row.
Naolí taught us the importance of vulnerability, transparency, and honesty in fostering a relationship with our clients that enhances their birth experience and supports our clients in a variety of physical, emotional, and spiritual ways! We practiced techniques, laughed, and cried together, and shared decades worth of sacred wisdom that made each of us a better birth practitioner.
Every mom, every baby, and every birth are unique! As a birth photographer, doula, and student midwife, I believe that establishing a foundation of comfort, trust, and vulnerability goes a long way to having a birth experience that fills you with joy and pride when you think back on it.
Who you invite into your birth space matters, and it’s a profound honor for me to be welcomed in! If the vibes are off, it can stall your labor, which can lead to a cascade of interventions, increasing you and your baby’s risks of complications. If I’m going to walk into your birth space and witness one of the most powerful and transformative moments of your entire life, I owe it to you to put the work in to get to know you and open my heart to you in return, so you feel safe and secure in my presence.
If you’re the type of person who could talk for hours about each of your births and you’re not shy about all of the details, we can discuss over text at your convenience, schedule a phone call or FaceTime video, or coordinate a day to go grab a smoothie and chat about some of the topics below.
If you’re a very private person and you’re not interested in a deep discussion about birth history, trauma, and your birth plan, that’s totally okay!
Your Birth Team
In my client consent form, I ask for information about who will be attending your birth, and their roles and responsibilities. If you’d like, we can discuss your relationships with the people who will be in attendance during and after your delivery, and how you envision us fulfilling specific roles and responsibilities.
I hope that everyone in attendance at your birth will prioritize your needs and desires, but if there will be any difficult personalities in attendance, a heads up would be appreciated. And if you need support or advocacy to protect your birth experience from that: as a doula and student midwife, we are the protectors of your oxytocin.
(Yes, this means if you want me to invite a nurse into the hallway for a private chitchat about how badly she’s pissing you off and she’s not allowed back in your room, I am willing to be The Bad Guy.)
Pictured: Savannah’s baby boy is delivered. A nurse holds her daughter for a front row view of the delivery, while her husband stands at her head, and her mom stands in the background in case it was too intense for her 4-year-old daughter to watch.
Doula Support from
a Student Midwife
After you’ve filled out my consent form and I’ve got your phone number and important information, we’ll start chatting about the more in-depth details the birth experience you’re envisioning, whether you’d like me at your birth as a photographer, some doula/student midwife advice, a full doula experience, a hybrid model of support, or if you’d like a separate referral for a trusted doula. And if this isn’t your first baby, we’ll also explore your pregnancy, birth, and postpartum history together, which can help me identify warning signs to watch out for, better understand the role you envision me fulfilling at your birth, and better advocate for you with your providers.
We will work together to formulate a plan for when you’d like me to join you. Some mamas are more private, and don’t want to summon a birth photographer until they’re far enough into labor to ask for an epidural, and they’d prefer me to be a stealthy ninja on the sidelines while they’re in the zone, and others want to have more documentation of their early labor for a more full picture of their baby’s whole birthday, including their birth supporters and care team, the details of the room, etc, and we tend to pass the time with longer conversations and have a great time together.
Plan to keep in touch during your pregnancy, and have more regular check-ins after about 35-36 weeks. Be sure to text me when it feels like labor is on the horizon: leaking or broken bag of waters, prolonged and regular braxton hicks contractions, a passed mucus plug, restlessness, and excitement that it might be about to happen, are all signs that birth may be imminent, and that it’s probably time for me to start making arrangements for child care and making sure my birth bag is packed, my memory cards are empty, and my camera batteries are fully charged.
When you’re nearly ready to summon me to your birth, or if I haven’t already responded to text messages: it’s time to call me!
Pictured: Discussing the night’s game plan with a new friend who had become a doula client, the night she went into labor with her third baby. Since we had a more informal arrangement like when I came to births to support my friends, our conversation didn’t begin with her signing my client intake and consent form, so I still didn’t have their address when things got moving and she was ready for some rebozo support!
Pain Management
& Coping Techniques
Whether you’re a nervous first time mom planning a hospital induction and have full intentions of getting the epidural the moment an anesthesiologist is available, or you’re a seasoned 4th time mom planning to go med-free in a home birth or at a birth center, I like to talk through the game plan with you ahead of time.
The brief window between back-to-back intense contractions with a posterior baby isn’t exactly the ideal time to be asking if you’re interested in trying a rebozo technique, or if you’d like to try my massage gun… you’re kinda busy!! Let’s chat about what I bring with me BEFORE you’re in transition and ♬ screaming, crying, throwing up ♬
Whether the initial plan is for me to be a ninja photographer silently witnessing your labor through my camera lens, or I’m supporting you as a doula and taking turns offering counter-pressure with your husband, mom, or bestie, I bring my full kit to each birth I attend. You’re welcome to borrow and utilize all of the tools I have to make your birth experience more comfortable.
Pictured: Megan calmly labors through the night in the birth tub after a full day of labor, comforted by the gentle touch of her husband Rhett, and the soothing sensation of hot water being poured over her belly by her doula, while battery powered candles help facilitate even more oxytocin production.
Later, when contractions got more intense, she squeezed a wooden comb. After multiple successful unmedicated births, this powerful mama (and doula!) utilized every last tool in her bag to ride out the pain of this very long and exhausting labor, eventually asking for nitrous and an epidural so she could rest for the pushing phase.
My Birth Toolkit
I bring a doula bag with me to every birth, and it includes a range of effective tools that many of us student midwives and doulas have come to love. This includes:
a rebozo (pictured: a large traditional woven Mexican scarf) which is great for swaying with your body, supporting your belly, tug-of-war if you have an epidural and are having a hard time pushing, even changing baby’s position, and shaking tension out of your back, hips, and legs. I have a full album displaying some of these rebozo techniques in my portfolio!
a massage gun, which can relieve tension and distract your brain from contractions, provide comfort and reinvigorate your birth team for those long births where we’ve all been on our feet for hours on end, and comes with multiple attachment heads for a variety of sensations to target specific needs.
wood combs to squeeze in your hands, in what we call the “gate control” technique - your nervous system can only process so much sensory input at one time, and by squeezing the rounded points of these combs into the Laogong acupressure point in the palm of your hand, you can disrupt some of your pain signals, which may be effective to ride through particularly intense contractions.
battery powered candles and a galaxy lamp - warm candlelight has been proven to stimulate your natural oxytocin production, while harsh bright lights are less relaxing and can be a hindrance to labor progression. Cozy lighting allows you to more easily slip into the liminal space of birth.
Do you cope well with pain? How would you describe your pain tolerance? Is an unmedicated birth important to you? What coping techniques work for you? Are you planning to bring any tools or utilize specific techniques during your labor?
Pictured: At Naolí Vinaver’s rebozo workshop, midwives and doulas gathered to learn about what a powerful tool the traditional Mexican rebozo is to support mothers through pregnancy and birth. Karely gently rocks Dani’s hips, while she melts into Isabelle’s arms. Look at the bliss on Dani’s face!
Trauma Informed Care
If you have trauma - whether that’s birth trauma, sexual trauma, abuse trauma, childhood trauma, and more - you may find that labor pushes you past your emotional limits to hold back pain you didn’t think would come up in your birth space. Trauma can be a bit unpredictable that way, and it makes sense to me that the transformational experience of birth can break the walls we put around the hard things to protect ourselves.
We can discuss your trauma and associated things that are still triggering for you. Maybe it’s being touched in certain places or ways on your body. Maybe it’s vaginal or perineal pain. It’s healthy to set boundaries with your care team, and it’s important to protect your mindset during birth, to prevent actions or conversations that activate your trauma and make you spiral into PTSD.
As a Certified Victim Advocate through UCASA, I am equipped to have very difficult and sensitive conversations, and I have connections to help you get access to resources available to you if you need them. Yes, this means I am a mandated reporter - if I suspect a child is being abused or neglected, I am required by law to report it.
You deserve to welcome your baby into the world in an environment that feels safe to you.
It’s important to me to support you through this experience with every tool in my skillset - including my experience and knowledge relating to trauma. Please know you can talk to me about even the most uncomfortable and heartbreaking things, without judgment or victim blaming.
Victims of trauma experience higher rates of depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts, and postpartum hormones put us at even greater risk of experiencing mental illness. I experienced severe postpartum mental illness for over 8 years. You are not alone, and you can message me any time.
